{Straight From the Heart} *The Family Portrait* 2/1/00
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The Family Portrait
By: Thomas M. Ledin
Christmas Day, 1977 my family posed for a picture taken by Mr. Bellows, our
next door neighbor. That photo has become the benchmark for all family
portraits taken of my family since, not a single one has equaled its
magnificence. In that wonderful picture my family is much smaller than it
is today, there are no sons-in-law, daughters-in-law, or grandchildren,
just my father, my mother, my brother, my sister, and me. We're all sitting
up amazingly straight, and our smiles are so perfect they almost look drawn
on. This photo is entirely beautiful in its simplicity, and truly
impressive in its rarity.
I admit that a good family portrait doesn't seem like anything to get too
excited about, but consider the fact that every year since 1977 my poor
mother has tried unsuccessfully to improve upon that masterpiece. My mom
has that picture hanging in an ugly gold frame, large as life, opposite the
front door in her house. It hangs there as a trophy for all to see. "My
perfect little family," she says every time I follow her in the front door.
I can recall with more than a little guilt the years my mother tried to
corral us into neat little two rowed formations for a photo, and the grief
we all gave her. We never made it easy on her, whether it was bunny ears
behind Julie's head, or Josh pinching the sensitive part on the back of my
arm, or my dad's favorite, passing gas a second before the picture was
snapped. From 1977 on, no picture that contained my entire family came out
well. We got some nice pictures of individuals, even a group of two or
three, but when any more than that were told to sit still and smile
somebody inevitably messed it up.
It wasn't always our fault, in 1991 we thought for sure the curse had been
broken. It was the day before my sister's wedding, and mom arranged to have
the photographer at the rehearsal dinner to make a valiant attempt to break
her slump. We had two additions to the family, my sister-in-law, and my
soon to be brother-in-law. The introduction of these new variables
increased the difficulty level considerably, but we were prepared. The
photographer posed us like were modeling for the cover of Perfect Family
Monthly, and we all behaved ourselves. Aunt Lucy stood by the photographer
and snapped a few pictures with her Polaroid camera. After our photo shoot
we gathered around Lucy's magically appearing Polaroids, which came out
terribly blurry, however, our faces could be made out, and nobody was doing
anything stupid. My mother was so happy she almost cried. She knew in about
three weeks the professional's proofs would arrive, and she would be able
to hang another perfect family portrait opposite the front door near the
stairs.
I was there the day the proofs came, the pictures of the wedding were
beautiful, but there were no rehearsal pictures in the package. During the
phone call with the photographer to find out where they were, my mom burst
into tears and hung up. "He lost the negatives," she said in a flat voice
as she left the kitchen. I heard her pause by the '77 wonder picture, and
then proceed upstairs. I vowed then that I would join my mother's cause and
cooperate at every single photo-op.
It's been eight years since the rehearsal dinner, and a second decent
portrait has yet to be taken. We've had plenty of opportunities, my
wedding, Dad's retirement party, and eight Christmases. During that eight
years five grandkids have arrived, and the difficulty of getting the
perfect picture has increased exponentially. My mom had almost completely
given up on her quest and I was not the champion of her cause I had hoped
to be.
There we were the entire family together, twenty-two years after the
perfect portrait was taken. There were no smiles to photograph that day. As
I walked into my mother's house with my son on my hip, we stopped and
starred at the portrait, and my son asked, "Who are they Daddy?" I couldn't
answer him, I recognized no one. Standing over my dad's casket with my
brother and sister, I could not stop thinking about the second perfect
portrait my mom never got.
My mother did not make much of an appearance the day of the wake; she came
downstairs for a bit, mainly to thank everyone for coming. My brother,
sister and I went to her house the next day, before making the various
trips to the airport. As we opened the front door we noticed immediately
that the perfect portrait of 1977 was gone, and in its place was a portrait
from 1995. It was the worst picture ever taken of my family. In it, my eyes
are closed, my brother is leaning down to scold his misbehaving son, my
sister is yawning, two grandchildren are facing away from the camera, and
my dad's hand is planted squarely on my Mother's left breast. In that
picture my mother is wearing the biggest smile I have ever seen. When we
finally tore ourselves away from 1977's replacement, we saw that every wall
was now home to at least one of our year's worth of terrible family
portraits. By the stairs, 1981, where my brother was hung over and looked
terrible, and my sister was frowning. Near the dinning room table was 1987
where my dad was grabbing my ears. 1990 was on the wall next to the
bathroom, it was almost perfect, except for my sister-in-law's eyes were
rolled back in her head, and my tongue was doing something strange. We
wandered around the house for twenty minutes in silence looking at these
framed portraits that had been hidden away in the attic. They were awful
examples of how a family should pose for pictures, but they were perfect
representations of my family. After twenty-two years my mother realized
that beautiful old 1977 in its ornate gold painted frame was the mistake,
in fact it wasn't a picture of her family at all.
Thomas M. Ledin
TLedin@baf.com
Send Thomas an email and let him know what you thought about his story!
A little bit about Thomas:
I am 30 years old and work for Basic American Foods doing computer 'stuff'.
I am a husband to the beautiful Deniece (27), and the father of the wonderful
Tanner (10.5months). We live in the San Francisco Bay Area, and absolutely
love it here.
I am hard at work on my first novel, no, that's a lie. I wish I were hard
at work on it. I have started it, but mostly I just think about working on
it! It's far more fun to play with Tanner than it is to toil in front of
the keyboard.
Check out his web site!
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UPDATES:
From: cybercatz2@earthlink.net (Loyd & Janet Wood Jr.)
Hello everyone,
My wife's best friend called us tonight and told us that the doctors could not
find any more cancer in her mothers body anywhere, and that she should
be on the road to recovery. She has to have a colostomy bag for a
while until she totally heals but will come off once that happens.
Thank you all so much for your prayers....smiles
Some of you have also asked if we have had any new news on Baby Sarah.
Well, the only thing that I can tell you right now is that, she
still appears to be very strong and active. The heart beat is normal.
In about three weeks, which is about February 15, 2000, they will be
inducing labor. This date has not been set in stone yet, but will be
next week. The doctor will then set everything up at the hospital for
that day, and will have the whole team of specialists waiting on call
just in case we should need them. Once birth occurs, they will check
her out, very thoroughly, and will asses a decision then as to when
surgery will be performed, if at all. I still feel in my heart that
she is going to be born and things are going to turn out just fine, I
could be wrong and if I am, well, God will help me deal with whatever
I must face....smiles You all have been such a great help to me and
my wife, if it would have not been for you all keeping us in prayer,
I know that we would not have been able to deal with things quite so
calmly. We will continue to keep you all up to date, and please
continue to pray for us as this time does draw closer. Thank you all
so much....smiles
Love,
Loyd
From: Hunsun@ticon.net (Debra Adler)
Dear family and friends,
Steve is doing very well. Much better than expected. He went into surgery
yesterday at 1:00 for about 3 hrs, and then into recovery for 2 1/2 hrs.
We finally got to see him around 7:00. He is in alot of pain and BUT is
not having the extreme vertigo and nausea they said he would be having. We
were told he would be so dizzy just moving his head a little bit or opening
his eyes would make him extremely sick. However, he is not experiencing
that at all!! We can tell there was alot of prayer involved!!
We know this surgery was the right thing. It is amazing how well it went
and how he is doing considering what we were told to expect. Prayer works!!
Keep praying he will have a quick recovery, no infections, bleeding, etc.
Thank you for your prayers.
Steve, Lea and Micah
From: Beals7OfUs (Donna Beals)
Our precious grandbaby is here!!!!!!!!!
Zachary Stephen
date: Monday Jan. 31st
time: 4:00 PM
weight: 8lb 4oz
length: 19 1/2
Zachary's condition: doing good, will need surgery on his heart
in the next couple of days ,but nothing that can't be fixed.
Jessica's condition: GREAT- feels just fine
This is from Grandpa, Grandma can till you more later
KEEP PRAYING
Donna
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Thought For The Day:
"A diamond is a chunk of coal that dealt with the pressure."
Verse for the Day:
"Consider it all joy...when you encounter various trials, knowing that
the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have
its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in
nothing."
James 1:2-4
Kid's Thought For The day:
"Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a Tic-Tac."
Parent's Thought For The Day
"If your parents never had children, chances are you wont, either.
(Dick Cavett)
Coach's Thought For The Day
"Ability will take you to the top, but it takes character to keep you
there."
(John Wooden)
Deep Thought For The Day:
"Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined."
_
/_/\/\ MICHAEL T. POWERS
\_\ / THUNDER27@aol.com http://members.aol.com/Thunder27/index.html
/_/ \ "For I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but
\_\/\ \ Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body I live for the Son
\_\/ of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." Galatians 2:20
"I thought of you first after my family sat down to watch the video
we gave them. They loved it, to say the least! Within thirty
seconds my mom was crying and my dad did too. They said it was
the best Christmas gift we could have given them!! You did such
a beautiful job! They were so suprised and so touched---they
really, really, really loved it. Thanks for helping to make it so
special to us all. My mom mentioned how the songs were perfect for
the video too! Thanks again!"
Kelli (RKaGe@aol.com) College Station, TX
Let me make you a video from your pictures or home movies!
Check out the web page for Michael's video production business!
Video Imagery
http://members.aol.com/Videoimg/index.html