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{Straight From the Heart}   *And When I Die*  10/10/00
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Welcome to "Straight From the Heart!"

If you enjoy this free daily email service, I encourage you to forward it on to family and friends. If this has been passed along to you and you want to join the list, just send a blank email to: 
Thunder27@aol.com
I appreciate any feedback or constructive criticism, so feel free to write me (Michael T. Powers) and let me know what you think!

Straight From the Heart
http://www.storiesfrommyheart.com

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Today we have another wonderful story by submitted by Roger Dean Kiser, Sr. 
To fully understand his story listed below, you have to know that Roger was an orphan, who was physically, mentally and sexually abused by the Children's Home Society, The Florida School for Boys at Marianna and the State of Florida. On his website, Roger writes:

"I tell my stories not out of self-pity or because I want anyone to feel sorry for me. I have written these stories, the best I can from a child's point of view so that the world will know what a child secretly feels when he or she is abused and is afraid to speak.

I have moved on with my life and now have a wife, four children and eight grandchildren. I have learned much from the pain that I have suffered. I have also lived on both sides of the fence and hope that the world can learn something from what I have written.

It has not been easy for me to expose the secret inner thoughts (mind) of an orphan, an abused child, a juvenile delinquent, a criminal, an ex-con and now a self-rehabilitated grandfather who has "seen the light" and now lives in "the real world".

However, because of changing times, school shootings and whatever else is happening to our children today. The secret inner thoughts of these people; the one's such as myself who are considered to be dysfunctional individuals must be written about, looked at, studied and evaluated. NOW!

Sadness and loneliness are all that I ever knew. They are the only two things that the world ever gave me as a little boy and it is now all that I truly own in my heart. Sadly I say, those two feelings are all that I have to offer back to the world (through my stories) in hopes of making it a better place for the innocent children of tomorrow.

I will never forget seeing the last page of my life story come out of the printer. I have never felt so proud. I will never forget slipping that last page into its plastic cover. A protective cover that I have for each and every page that I have written. Then I felt it coming over me and the tears started to roll down my cheeks.

I, at that very moment realized that all the sadness, loneliness, misery and pain that I had suffered as a child; That all the heartache and pain from all those years of being beaten and abused; Everything that had been inside of my head for all those years I was now holding in my hands. That I was actually able to feel the unbelievable weight of thirteen pounds of heartache, and that I was now able to look at it, for the very first time with my very own eyes.

It was absolutely the saddest thing that I have even known as a human being."


Nobody.  I mean, nobody can affect me more with their writing than Roger can.  If you don't believe me, just check out Roger's website (listed below) and start reading some of his stories.  If you spend any amount of time there you will come away a changed person.  I look forward to owning Roger's book when it is published later this year and urge every single one of you on this list to get a copy.  It is a book that needs to be read by everyone. 

If I may share something I sent to Roger a month or so ago:

 I am continually in awe of Roger's incredible stories. Each one touches some part of my heart and soul.  But I am even more in awe of Roger as a person.  There is no one in this world who has more "reason" to use his past as an excuse for present problems than Roger. However, instead of becoming full of hatred, bitterness, and spite, Roger has become someone full of love, hope, and encouragement.  Yes, I am sure it was a long hard road, with many trials since his youth, but he has come
through the refiner's fire as tempered steel and not ashes.  Roger, may you
continue to fight the good fight, and use your past as a way to make a difference in the lives of millions!  If only all of us were so strong of character and convictions!

Thank you Roger and Judy for sharing your wonderful stories with all of us here at Straight From the Heart!

Michael

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AND WHEN I DIE

By Roger Dean Kiser Sr.


AND WHEN I DIE, AND WHEN I'M GONE. THERE WILL BE SOMEONE THERE TO CARRY ON
 
Boy! what a wonderful feeling it is to make a child feel smart and
special and it costs nothing at all. It is all free, just for the
taking.
 
I, like you do not know when we am going to die. But I do know this. It
is going to be a very good day for me because I will have loved my grand
daughter so much, and I will have made her feel "so smart", "so special"
and "so pretty" that my passing will be one of the saddest days of her
life.
 
I will look down and I see her crying and I will feel so proud of
myself. I will know that I have done my job, as a grandparent and that I
have done it well.
 
It will be good to know that the chain of abuse and the wrongs that I
suffered, as a child will finally have been broken and that all the pain
that I endured will have been used, by me to make a much better tomorrow
for my family in the future.
 
Yes, there are many things that happened down through the years that I
wish that I would have done differently. I understand now that I could
have been a better parent, a more loving husband and a more
understanding father. Many of us really did not have very much to work
with when we finally broke away from our own abusive situations.
 
But through the years many of us have taken the broken pieces and we
have somewhat put our own lives back together. Yes, there are still many
cracks in the dam, and there always will be.
 
There are those of us who have chosen to not give up. We stood there,
year after year with our bloody hands pressed against the leaking
cracks, holding back the flood, allowing our children and grandchildren
time to build their own strong foundations.
 
For some of us our own children may never even realize how much we
really gave of ourselves. But that's OK, that's the price good parents
pay sometimes.
 
And when I die, and when I'm gone will I have left someone to carry on?
YES, when I am gone I will have left someone much more kind, much more
gentle and much more loving than myself. That is a wonderful feeling and
it is a very special gift that we can be proud of.
 
One day when all the pictures we took of ourselves are faded and gone,
never to be seen again. That is when the story about our good deeds, and
sacrifices will be told for new ears, on sleepy little smiling faces, in
a "happy" story reading: "Once upon a time....."

Roger Dean Kiser, Sr.  
trampolineone@webtv.net

Send Roger an email and let him know what you thought of his story!
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A little bit about Roger:

Roger Dean Kiser Sr. and his wife Judy have been married for five years
and live in Brunswick, Georgia. They have four cocker spaniels (Lady,
Prozac, Precious and Little Bit), a large chow named Cody, as well
as Roger's aquarium with fifteen tiger barbs. Roger loves to fish
(catch and release) on his small fishing boat but rarely went out
the last year or so as he spent most of his time working on his book "ORPHAN",
which will be released in December, as well as working on child abuse issues, about ten to fifteen hours a day.

Check out more of Roger and Judy's writing on our website:

Straight From the Heart
http://www.storiesfrommyheart.com

Just type in "Kiser" on the search box and click go!

You can pre-order Roger's much anticipated book at the following site:

Orphan by Roger Dean Kiser, Sr.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1580624480/qid%3D971076414/straighfromthe0a

You absolutely have to check out Roger's website below!
Believe me, you won't leave the site without being touched in a big
way...
Michael

Orphan
http://www.geocities.com/trampolineone/
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Thought For The Day:

"Here is the test to see if your mission here on earth is finished:  If you are alive, it isn't."
(Richard Bach)

Verse for the Day:

"For as the days of a tree, so will be the days of my people; my chosen ones will long enjoy the works of their hands."


Kid's Thought For The Day:

"Sometimes you need a little push to go down the big slide."

Parent's Thought For The Day

"If your baby is 'beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time', you're the grandma."
(Theresa Bloomingdale)

Coach's Thought For The Day

"We're never as good as we think we are, nor as bad as we think we are."
(Adolph Rupp, former college basketball coach)

Deep Thought For The Day:

"Drive-in banking was invented so cars could go in and see
    their real owners."

 

  _
/_/\/\    MICHAEL T. POWERS
\_\  /    THUNDER27@aol.com  
/_/  \    "For I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but
\_\/\ \   Christ lives in me.  The life I live in the body I live for the Son
   \_\/   of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me."  Galatians 2:20 


Video Imagery (Michael's Video Production Business.)

"I thought of you first after my family sat down to watch the video we gave them. They loved it, to say the least!  Within thirty seconds my mom was crying and my dad did too.  They said it was the best Christmas gift we could have given them!!  You did such a beautiful job!  They were so surprised and so touched---they really, really, really loved it.  Thanks for helping to make it so special to us all.  My mom mentioned how the songs were perfect for the video too!  Thanks again!"
        
Kelli  (RKaGe@aol.com)    College Station, TX

Let me make you a video from your pictures or home movies!
Check out the web page for Michael's video production business!
 Video Imagery
http://members.aol.com/Videoimg/index.html


Do you feel as if life has no meaning for you?
 The Four Spiritual Laws
http://www.ccci.org/laws/index.html


Writer's guidelines for Straight From the Heart can be found here:

Writer's Guidelines
http://storiesfrommyheart.com/writer_s_guidelines/

The copyrights to the stories that appear here are owned by the authors and are used with their permission.  This email may be forwarded in its entirety, but please do not cut and paste the stories to be used elsewhere unless you have contacted, and been given permission, by the individual writer. 
Thanks!

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Transfer your photographs or old home videos over to DVD or MP4 files! Give the gift that will touch your family's heart and soul.
Chimney Balloon Fireplace Damper

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